MY LEARNING FALL AND RISE

On August 12 which was the first day of my Jr year I walked into my AP English class which in my mind I was like 'Oh well this is a class that I'm not going to do well in but at least im getting my extra point' but when I see inside the class I see an empty room without posters about English like my previous classes. I also notice my new teacher, my first thought was oh shoot this guy seems like he's going to be on my ass and isn't going to let me turn in stuff late or get annoyed of what I usually do. I'm a smart kid but at first I start good with everything and I stay on track but then once I fall behind or get too much work I just tend to stress out and not do my work then it piles up and I get more stressed and just give up. So later on when the bell rings and class starts I take a seat in the back waiting to see if there's going to be a seating chart but when minutes pass I don't see anything but Dr. Preston introduce himself. When he started to explain to us what the class is about, I expected this class to be a lot of writing, essays, and lots of worksheets off a book, but then he starts to say how we won't be following the book which I liked in a way but then I said to myself 'what about the AP test? Don't we need to get ready for that?' after that thought Dr. Preston then says that we can either go by the book or do blogs and thats something ive never done but then I knew it was going to be easier and less work so when he stepped out I was telling everyone I knew in the class to go with blogs cause it'll be less work so the whole class then says they want blogs. Dr. Preston then said to us how we will also review for the AP test when it gets closer. Then Dr. Preston talks about himself, as he starts to explain about his life and how he grew up in a not so good neighborhood, how he played basketball and went to UCLA he then starts to cuss which I was shook because I knew when teachers do that it means they'll be nice and chill so at that moment I started to like Dr. Preston. Once class was over I was happy knowing I wasn't going to have a teacher thats going to be strict and on my ass. Over the next couple of days he Explains to us what we need to do with blogs, journal entries, recording ourselves, and poetry tests. At first I was confused about the journals on how much we need to write and what to do with blogs or what a blog is. So those two where one of the main things I was confused on but overall it was the whole course because its something Ive never done and I didn't know how ill be graded on my work. Through the middle of the school year I was confused a lot because I did new things like socratic seminars and other times we'll do like 3 blogs in one day so by that time I was already falling behind and confused so I just stopped trying to catch up for awhile because I knew it was too much work and why bother stressing when thats just bad for myself. After a couple of weeks Dr. Preston gives us an announcement about someone that made a list of blogs that will help us if we're behind and that helped me catch up with some of my blogs during the weekends and breaks so at that point Ive been using the list to help me. I focus more in class about what is more important like essays or things needed turned in so I focus on those more and left some blogs behind cause I need to prioritize. Now I feel like I've but more effort because at first I didn't understand the class which made me fall behind but now I've been catching up more and understanding the class more. One thing that has still stayed the same will be me still procrastinating because ive always have had that habit but I've been doing good lately with my blogs but I feel like they're not good enough and I just have them saved as drafts